Heroic Deadmines! (Or: Ripsnarl's Revenge)

Trying to keep my sanity together long enough to get through a few heroic dungeons. Unlike their normal counterparts, heroics seem to require one to pack a lunch. Even when a group is mostly guildies (not my guildies, mind you), it seems to take forever to organize pulls and talk over boss strategy. Of course, this might be the way that blizzard intended it to be, but it makes it difficult to farm your gear in a timely fashion.

Complaints aside, I actually enjoyed the dungeon and the boss mechanics we faced. For posterity, I want to talk about those boss mechanics, so that my guild and I can reference them at a later date.

Haughty Victory Pose!

I'm back, bitches!

Note the usage of a comma.

That's right. After a long hiatus, I'm back in-game and making people suffer. I know it's a little late for it, but I got my Kingslayer title last night, right before the Cataclysm launch. Obviously not a world first, but not bad for someone who got back into the game like... a month ago.

While pugging for said achievement, I met an awesome guild who invited me to tank for them horde side. So guess what I've been doing?

PVP BITCHES!

Keep an eye out for me, former alliance! If you get between me and my former guildies, then you'll be considered an appetizer.

WTF!?!?

Okay, so I was looking for a crappy video of a kid singing for my mom, when I came across the most fucked up thing I've seen in a long time. I usually don't post this kind of thing because there's a freakin' website dedicated to it, but seriously.... what the fuck?!?

I'm Seeing a Theme Here...

So... I quit my own supergroup. I'm feeling pretty lame right now, but christ I can't keep dragging the ball anymore. Dayn was supposed to help me... hell, it's his supergroup, originally. I just don't have the connections or enthusiasm to make the Peacekeeper Initiative anything more than a group of alts.

So I just gave it up. Booted everyone out and left them a nice letter telling them the PKI was done, and put in an application at a currently active supergroup. Why? Because I've spent too much time freakin' recruiting and tampering with that silly effin' base to actually enjoy myself. And I miss being a part of a super team. I haven't done that since my first few days on Virtue. The rest has been working on this stinkin' group.

So yeah... I quit a lot of things... Probably should learn to stick it out... but whatever. It's a video game, and if you're not having fun in a fucking video game, it's time to bail.

DPS Tracks 28: Cover week!!! part 5

The Supergroup leader scene in City of Heroes sucks ass. Imagine that... you know what, nevermind. There is no WoW analogy. Basically, because the majority of the content is before max level and they give you 12 character slots, people in CoH make a -lot- of alts. This makes it very difficult to keep your members active since, once joining, there is a good chance that they'll just not log into that character ever again. Kinda silly, isn't it?

...I need to clean up my roster...

Anyway, Friday wraps up with another Dragonland cover. Don't know why I couldn't bother to find another band... but whatever. The heat does funny things to my brain.

DPS Tracks 27: Cover week!!! part 4

It's entirely possible that I'm running out of covers... well, not really.. Sonata Arctica and Dragonland seriously have one or two cover songs on each special edition album, but it would be way too easy to whore those guys out. So instead, as is the case at least once in every party ever thrown, it's time to bring out the fucking Bon Jovi.

And yes, that's how -everybody- dressed in the 80s. EVERYBODY.

DPS Tracks 26: Cover week!!! part 3

*Yawn* I've been sleeping all day and I just can't think of much to say. Don't you hate when your dog (you might not own a dog) hogs the blankets and you're just laying down from 4am-8am out of habit and not actually sleeping?

Yeah... I need to have a talk with that dog...

Coming up is a Sonata Arctica cover of the Scorpions classic "Still Loving You."

DPS Tracks 25: Cover week!!! part 2

My brother's going back to World of Warcraft. Who saw that coming? To put it in perspective, he has asked me on more than one occasion when I'm going to stop playing those "stupid MMOs."

w/e

Next up, it's time for a cover by the champs of American mainstream metal. Five Finger Death Punch (affectionately known as FFDP) has enjoyed quite a bit of success if radio is any indication, and released their second album late last year.

On that album was a cover track originally written and performed by English superband Bad Company. Of course, Lexi and a few others enjoy the original version more than the covers... but at this point, I'm just amazed that Lexi knows who the band is. Gotta take your victories where you can get them.

DPS Tracks 24: Cover week!!!

I don't know if anybody remembers that far back, but the first DPS Tracks entry at WWOD was an awesome cover. Since then, I've run into more than my fair share of bands eager to pay homage to the greats that came before them in the form of B-sides and bonus tracks. So, I thought it'd be appropriate if I shared.

And y'know.. it gives me an excuse to actively post... for at least a week... (shut up)

First up is a Dragonland cover of the Helloween (Japanese-released) single Sole Survivor.

Lyrics have been omitted for space and sanity, since some artists like to ad lib for their covers. (Editor's note: Blogger can eat me).

DPS meters... the good and the bad.

Holy Fucking Dog Shit Batman! Yes, dear readers you're eyes aren't deceiving you. I, Gincan, am actually writing something after seven months of silence. I've decided it's time for me to finally stop being so fucking lazy and actually post something that I've been meaning to post for quite some time. Today's topic is the ever controversial DPS meter, but I'm sure you already figured that out.


So there is this add-on that many people know and love called recount. It will tell you and your parties personal performance in simple and easy to read format. Sounds great right? The simple answer is, it can be. However, this seemingly harmless add-on can cause a veritable shit storm if it is abused.

So here's the good side of damage meters. You can use them to track your own personal performance. It's a great tool to use when trying to perfect your rotation while swinging away at a training dummy. I've personally tested many different strategies of a Fury Warrior rotation and seeing what worked the best. This is in my opinion the best use of a meter.

The bad side of a damage meter is why I believe Blizzard has never taken the time to add in this feature to the default UI. The majority of the people abuse the fuck out of recount. You'll see it everywhere. Ass clowns posting the damage after every pull in a random dungeon. Dumb shits getting so obsessed with the number they actually believe the higher the number the better the player, hell I've even believed this one for a while. Unless you're an officer in a guild with the responsibility of making sure everyone is doing an appropriate level of DPS you should just turn recount off during a raid. It really doesn't fucking matter as long as your team can kill the boss.

Now I brought up the guild officer position about making sure players are contributing their fair share of the damage. This is a vital role that every guild should have, but this isn't supposed to be make fun of the guy in last place. His job is to simply look at the damage meters and make sure that people are meeting the requirements for the fight. If they are consistently under performing, then it's his job to try and find out what the problem is. From their he can either help the player out himself, or find someone of the same class that can give him some tips. That's how DPS in a guild should be run. I'm sure their are other ways of doing it that can work, but that's how I've seen it run smoothest.

And since we're on the topic of Damage meters I'd like to pass on an important lesson that I've learned. You can't do it all on your own. No matter how fucking hard you try, it's just not possible. You can cleave your way to the top of the charts, making everyone look like a god damn chump, but it doesn't amount to shit if the boss is still laughing at you when your group wipes. I've personally seen myself do over twice the amount of damage done in a single fight than the player in the number two spot on the meters, but guess what? We still wiped. Was the wipe my fault? Usually no, but to be honest I've caused my fair share.

So my little rant is coming to a close, and I'll leave you with this small nugget of knowledge. Don't get so caught up in the damage meters. If you play a Fury Warrior, congratulations, you should be beating just about everyone in dps. It's just the way the class is designed right now. We have more rage than we know what to do with at this stage in the game, that's why so many people have chosen to apply a rend when they have a hole in their rotation, the lost rage just doesn't matter that much. You'll be back to a full bar in one swing. So please don't piss me off and go posting the fact that you beat my dps in Heroic Nexus... I really don't fucking care.

2leep: You're next!

I've found a new target for my ire. Ever see a link on the side of a random stumble page and think, "That might be interesting!" For one, trust me, it's not. For two, the fucking link won't send you to the desired page... it'll send you to a page of links (in a shiny new tab or window), with one of them being your desired destination.

2leep is the offender's name, and it's punishment should be death. It claims that it's goal is to "connect bloggers," but I haven't been connected to anyone's blog yet... unless you consider those massive picture dumps a blog. And I fucking don't.

It takes absolutely no talent, journalistic integrity, or even thought patterns to put that shit on the internet. I'm not claiming that my blog is an ode to intellectualism... but at least I take the time to think and type out my thoughts in a constructive manner. I'd need a lobotomy to regress to simply posting stupid pictures and captioning them with 'lulz.'

So seriously, 2leep, get the FUCK out. You're part of the problem.

DPS Tracks 23: Bulletproof

I know I shove FFDP in people's faces, but I freakin' love this band. As far as I'm concerned, everything they do is golden. This one's no different. I like this one playing in the background to remind criminal's that they might as well have left their guns at home...

High School of the Dead

Wait a second... Xi's not an anime critic.

STFU, Earl! I am too an anime critic.

Well... I am in the sense that I can criticize -anything- with a straight face.

So out of the blue, Lexi (the draenei, not the dog) sends me a link to watch this anime called "House of the Dead" on some streaming website. It's a show based on a manga that is pretty much one of those zombie apocalypse stories.

Given it's rather simple setup, I think it's done really well. The writing is above par for a zombie flick, and the zombie killin' is as juicy and gory as it should be. The only thing that kinda rubs me the wrong way is the amount of gratuity shown in the anime. (LOL SPOILERS) The level of fan service reaches a shameless crescendo in episode 6 where the girls are all bathing together, and we get to see a lot of awkward, albeit completely nipple-less, breasts.

Gratuity in moderation, people. I mean, I don't mind nudity one bit. But I figure it should at least do something, plot-wise. I don't expect boobies to advance the plot or anything... but at least they provide sexual tension and/or development of a romantic interest. Nudity for the sake of nudity has always kinda ticked me off, in both American and Japanese films/t.v.

But if you can stomach that, I think the series, which apparently is still being shown on Japanese network/cable television, is worth a recommendation. And the theme song is kinda cool, too.

DPS Tracks 22: Anthem

My dog has been keeping me up at night. I'd have more to say about this band... but I'm half asleep, and it's only noon, so... yeah. Wiki links and junk after the youtube vid, which are naturally after the jump.

Ser-i-ously, Lindsey? (Or: Our System is Broken)

I don't really follow celebrity news. Mainly because I don't really get how anybody could give a shit about someone -just- because they were in a movie. Spoiler alert: Their lives are just as boring and they're just as big of an asshole as the rest of you.

The same applies to everyone's (FotM) favorite child-star-turned-alcoholic/drama queen Lindsey Lohan. Again, I didn't follow this story with much attention. All I know is that she was supposed to go to jail for 90 days. Ninety days... Three months, for you laymen. And what happened? She was out by day fourteen..

I've had WoW-inspired isolation sessions that lasted longer than that. Could the justice system not cope with her intense, awe-inspiring lameness for more than two weeks? My mom said she was out due to overcrowding, so with red in my eyes I started browsing the internet for a source... and I couldn't get a clear read on why she was released on account of my constant passing out. Why, you might ask?

Every article was filled with the kind of stuff that made you think she was a kidnapping victim, and had been missing for no less than a calendar year. There was an article about how she and her mother were "reunited" after two weeks apart. "I finally got to hug my daughter after two weeks of talking to her through glass."

...I didn't know you were living in your mom's uterus, Lindsey.

Seriously, though. The media parade surrounding little Miss Lohan is a fucking farce. They're all treating her like she's done nothing wrong; as though she's just a child in the wrong place at the wrong time. Every other word that I have read today has sent an impulse of pure, unadulterated rage down my spine, the kind which, if it could be harnessed into kinetic energy, would make Fat Man look like Milla Jovovich.

(That was a size pun. It was not a pun related to the proverbial bombs that are the Resident Evil movies. Thank you.)

So yeah, there was so much blood in the center of my brain responsible for being pissed off that I passed out while reading about it. At least three times. Whatever happened to being held responsible for your own actions? She had a DUI, which luckily didn't result in the injury or death of an innocent, and then violated her probation. Ninety days in solitary is too good for that little wench. I would've stuck her in gen-pop, and warmed up everyone the day before her arrival by making all the inmates watch Herbie Reloaded.

Then I'd take bets on who got to shank her first.

Bored.

Blogging these days is hard. It's not so much that I don't have anything to talk about. It's that, times like these, I feel like I don't have anybody to talk -to-. Yes, there are followers down on the sidebar, but they're all from my old "WARKRAFT RULZ" days. And I kinda miss that, honestly...

No, I don't miss Malfurion's Raiders or parsing through lists of sub-par gear upgrades. None of that junk. I miss browsing through all the blog/community links that holds everyone together. They've got massive websites dedicated to this mammoth of the game, and it feels like playing City of Heroes is like moving from the big city into sunny little Bumfuck, Egypt.

Yes, everybody knows each other and all that crap. I used to sift through articles, blog posts, freakin' miles and miles of comments, and now I get to kick around a tumbleweed. The forums aren't even very active. The Virtue forums ("Unofficial roleplaying server") only kick over like 20 times a day. And that's considered busy.

Holy fuck, where are all the people who -like- this game!?!?

Roger Ebert's Regrets

Ho-hum. It's not every day that a douchebag wishes to make up for his past mistakes with a public (sort-of-an) apology, but Roger Ebert is expressing that he "was a fool for mentioning video games in the first place" in his blog post on Thursday.

Of course, his blog post was marred with the dribble "I still think I'm right, I just should've kept my fat, cock-mouth shut." And what kind of shit is that? I guess he felt he had to say -something- when the shitstorm that is all gamers (and anybody with a modicum of common sense) rained down on him and his blog for what could've been the dumbest comment in history.

Anyway, I've gotta wrap this up because I've got some bad guys' asses to kick before 1:30. Roger Ebert doesn't get off the hook that easily. Nobody else on my shitlist does, so why would I let some no-talent movie critic off the hook?

Instead of offering to send Roger Ebert a bunch of video games so he can familiarize himself with games as an artform, I'm going to simply send him a spoon.

So he can eat my ass.

DPS Tracks 21: Duke Nukem Theme

Haven't really been around, for a while. Been discovering the joys of Xbox Live with Lexi and leading a new supergroup, at that. Well, it's an old supergroup.

The Peacekeeper Initiative is back after a two year hiatus, and we're doing reasonably well, if I do say so myself. I wish our attendance was a bit higher, but what can you do. This is City of Alts, y'know.

Anyway, I was rummaging through some old cds and found this gem. Thought I'd throw it out there. XD

DPS Tracks 20: Dying Breed

Over the course of the last year, DPS tracks has changed quite drastically. I used to have a playlist on my winamp client (god bless that little music player) labeled DPS, and I'd use it every time I raided (for maximum face-to-keyboard action).

Obviously, I don't raid anymore, and since the upgrade to Windows 7, I've lost that old playlist. Where does that leave it, then? Not that anybody cares, but I consider "DPS tracks" "music to rock to." It's my personal blend, and obviously everyone's mileage will vary. But it's what I game to, and it doesn't seem hard to imagine that others could game to it, too. Game on.

Stranded

From the Diary of Alana "Star" Weaver a.k.a. Miss Starfall

October 29th, 2008

I've been thinking about that one movie, lately. I can't remember what it's called... it's got that governor in it, and there's this robot that goes back in time to kill people. I'm pretty sure somebody won an award for it...

Anyway, it doesn't even matter. That movie was ancient when I was young, although I bet the people I know nowadays might think it's still new.

Anyway, I remember thinking about how I wish time travel worked that way: A small instance of an electrical storm heralding the arrival of a time traveler. Except, I wouldn't want to land in a parking lot all naked. That would be totally embarrassing!

Well, Hollywood's got it all wrong. To an extent, the Ouroburos doesn't really compare either. Not when you're talking about the random occurrence of a rip in the fabric of space-time. Those trips down the rabbit hole that is Portal Corp. didn't really prepare me either. They both have their guidelines and preparations, and even then, you have to physically interact with some device (technological or otherwise) in order to commence the transport.

So there I was, checking out some trouble in an alternate reality, when I tripped over (or into?) aforementioned rip. You think Portal Corp. could have forecast that sort of thing. I know who I'm not going to for my 7-day weather and sports.

Where was I? Oh, yeah... Time traveling isn't like in the movies. When that rip opens up, it's going to open up somewhere on the other end, and you no idea where. It could put you in the middle of an open field, all nice and neat and sitting indian-style. Imagine if the earth is in a different position in relativity to the sun from where it was in the world that you left. You could end up in the darkness of space, or in the middle of a mountain.

I 'chose' the middle ground. I was only about 25,000 feet in the air. This normally wouldn't be a problem, but for some strange reason, in the few weeks surrounding my appearance in this timeline/universe, some of my powers didn't really work. Of these powers, flight was the most important, given the situation.

I actually screamed and cried for the first time that I can remember since grade school. Hurdling towards the earth, I prayed and pleaded with no one in particular for my flight to be restored. I could see my tears slipping off of my face and into the sky above me as I plummeted to my doom.

This must be how Tom Welling feels...

No need to worry, though. A building broke my fall.

The police officers said I actually crashed through 22 stories before coming to a stop in the middle of an old oak conference table, which I still managed to crack before my descent of property damage was over. I must've been in shock, because I really can't remember any of it. The paramedics said I was curled up in the fetal position, sucking my thumb, when they rushed to treat what was only a few cuts and bruises.

After my short recovery, I was immediately contacted by the owners of the building. It seems, even though I wasn't registered with this world's Hero Registry, they still managed to find me. And they wanted me to pay for the extensive property damage I had caused just a few days prior.

Little did I know that it would be the first of many damages I'd have to pay before all was said and done...

More of the Same

It's time again for one of those "why the fuck can't I sleep?" posts from that insomniac, dyslexic agnostic you've all come to know and love. Joke's aside, I've been feeling like crap all month. Dizzy spells and the like. It's gotten better, so I'm hoping that sooner or later, it'll just go away if I just take care of myself. If it doesn't, well... what's the worst that could happen?

So I played Red Dead Redemption. And it might be the game of the year. It's that damn good. Probably the best game I've played in a long time. A western sandbox really is much more fun than it sounds. I think the reason it's so good is because there is less sandbox and more plot/purpose to it than the average GTA clone. They give you plenty to do, and it's not all typical, "tee-hee, i can blow shit up" kinda stuff. I'm on my second playthrough, 95% total completion. Yeah, it really is that good. Don't walk, run to get yourself a copy.

Last Show Standing

Warning: Unintelligible rant ahead!

Last year, I remember watching three shows fairly religiously: House M.D., Smallville, and Supernatural. But as time passed by, I realized something. Love triangles suck. I don't mean just a little bit. I mean Jenna Jameson at a hot dog eating contest.

We'll start with Smallville, since that's pretty much all they do there. I only watch the show for the meaty goodness that is the Superman universe. But they only really touch on it for the season finales/premiers, so the middle is like an oreo with some abominably flavored stuffing that nobody likes. Maybe... peep-flavored oreos. Awesome chocolate cookie on the outside, bullshit squishy disappoint-flavored candy-chick in the middle. If I see another "Lana returns" arc I'm going to drive up to the studios and punch random people in the crotch.

Which brings me to House. Gregory House, everybody's favorite wise-cracking, pill-popping doctor (with a horrible bedside manner) has never been in a serious relationship. Unless you count those episodes with Stacy in season 2. But even then, it was more of a "suck it, you can't have a relationship" kind of thing. So how did the love triangle happen? Apparently, our doctor got "better" (such a relative term), and wants to finally get with Lisa Cuddy, his boss. And of course, because the network heads know how much Xi dislikes love triangles, she's written to date some d-bag that had a guest spot like... 2 seasons ago. I can't even remember the guy's name.

Seriously hate love triangles.

So Supernatural is pretty much the only show on my plate. Not only does the show get better and better every week, but there is no room for love triangles. The two brothers (which are popular in the gay fanfic circles -_-) are trying to stop the end of the world. There's no time for that weaksauce romance and love triangles that the CW is good at pumping out.

So there you have it. Supernatural is pretty much the best show on T.V. Go watch it or something. And save your drama for your mama.

DPS Tracks 19: Everlasting

I just killed a cockroach the size of my big toe, while screaming "eat loafer mother bitch!" It was kinda cool.

At least, it was the highlight of my day since lately I've felt like rolling over and dying. I really don't know what's wrong with me, but it's getting a little old.

Moving on, the new influx of awesome bands included an interesting (and already broken up) band from Japan. Japanese heavy metal, you say? It's not a joke, I swear. These guys know how to use a double bass pedal, have a rockin' guitar soloist, and are bold enough to use an electric organ. Top that!

Issue 17 Goes Live Today

Coinciding with it's 6th anniversary, Paragon Studios is releasing the 17th free update to City of Heroes. It's amazing to me that they've stuck it out for so long, given that for the most part they fly under the mmo radar. But here's the thing: the fans that CoX does have, they're real fans. Not those "I'm gonna quit this shitty game when Warhammer comes out" WoW fans. Real, superhero-to-the-core fans. And that's something you have to admire.

Sticking it out for the long haul rewards those fans with added features and content that shows the development team tries to listen to it's fanbase without sacrificing the integrity of the game (see Star Trek Online). Also, they get neat veteran rewards and anniversary rewards.

Issue 17: Dark Mirror is fairly modest in size, content wise. After all, we're only getting four or so story arcs out of the deal. However, it lays the groundwork for their third paid expansion, Going Rogue. And that's something to be excited about. The Going Rogue system is innovative, and allows heroes and villains to walk the line between good and evil, and possibly cross it. But let's not get ahead of ourselves...

What Issue 17 does give us is the new graphical update (albeit a superficial one), as well as extra costume pieces and animated tails. We also get some neat "quality of life" updates, including the ability to send money to ourselves via the mail system (iknorite?).

All in all, I'm pretty excited about the changes coming to the game. I'm starting to think that I came back to the game at exactly the right time.

DPS Tracks 18: Beethoven's Nightmare

I wouldn't consider myself "cutting edge DPS" anymore, but I still find excuses to whack the metaphorical pinata until my hands and face are coated with... candy. And when I am giving mob bosses are bad day, I need tunes with a visceral, sometimes carnal feeling to them.

Everybody who's visited WWOD knows I have a thing for power metal, and Dragonland fits that bill pretty nicely. Some of their tracks are much more musically ambitious than the standard fare, and that might be why I like them so much. In Beethoven's Nightmare, from their most recent album Astronomy, Dragonland uses themes and motifs from Beethoven's work, and they sound equally timeless on guitar as they did on piano.

I actually found this band through a friend of a friend, who thought my taste in music could benefit from adding even more of the same thing to my library. They were right. xD

Xi's Guide to Not Sucking in City of Heroes Pt. 1

So I got to thinking, the other day. Just because I'm not playing WoW anymore doesn't mean I'm necessarily forced into refraining from belittling my fellow player for the sake of comedy and higher learning. I've still got other MMO's that could use my touch, and I'm more than willing to show people how to play.

So, without further ado...

Thoughts on Roger Ebert...

I took a few moments (and only a few moments) to browse over this journal entry that everybody is shitting their pants about, and I only really have one thing to say about it.

...Roger Ebert can suck it.

The big stink is over his (apparently) casual dismissal of video games as art. Now, I didn't think I really had to say it, but blog posts and their comments haven't really hit the mark. They're too busy trying to be right that they've missed two pretty obvious points. That's where I come in.

Wikipedia defines art as "...the process or product of deliberately arranging elements in a way to affect the senses or emotions." Whether it is or isn't interactive is completely beyond the point. Games are art. Check out a dictionary, Ebert.

The second major point is that Roger Ebert is a shitty movie critic. Films are considered a medium of art, and I'd be inclined to agree, but I wouldn't trust the final word to some chump who is paid by large studios to pull his thumb out of his ass to put it on display for poorly conceived movies.

Whew... that was a long sentence. If you doubt my findings, just remember Roger Ebert gave Titanic a positive review.

I'm just saying. You wouldn't ask someone to make you a five course meal if they're prone to lighting PB&J sandwiches on fucking fire.

On a completely unrelated note, I'm hiring myself out as a freelance obituary and eulogy writer. Leave a comment to ask for rates.

I Don't Know If I Mentioned This...

I sorta quit WoW three months ago. Almost to the day, for that matter. And believe me, I've read every "I quit /wah" forum and blog post in the entire freakin' universe, so I thought I'd spare everyone the emo/angst trip and just leave quietly. Long story short: There was some... guild... management issues, and I just left. Gave all my primordial saronite to the guild leader and /gquit (Something like 28 pieces between me and Lexi).

After that, I signed up for Star Trek Online and bought a lifetime sub to Star Trek Online like the sucker I am, and the rest is history. Sort of...

What followed is the worst string of bad luck I've ever experienced in such a short period. Again, you get the short version: I've been through two monitors, a whole freakin' computer, and my car asploded. Combine that with the fact that Star Trek Online's design team waited until -after- the lifetime sub grace period ended to show us how stupid they were, and I'm actually starting to regret quitting.

Yeah, I know.

I wasn't one of those people who thought Warcraft kept my universe together.  On the contrary, I was looking forward to getting rid of something that my non-Warcraft friends considered an addiction.  So I quit, and I get mechanical (and in the case of NCSoft: brain) failures across the board, as if WoW was singlehandedly keeping my world from falling apart at the seams.

Doesn't make any sense to me, either.  If you ask me, the whole thing is kind of lame.  If the universe wants to beg me to go back to Warcraft, an email would suffice.  I really could do without replacing computer and fucking car.

The urge to spill my (not-so-)religious beliefs aside...  I've been struggling to blog lately.  The three months away from WWOD was intentional, since I had planned to just fork it over to Gincan.  But TeamDXL never became what I needed it to be.  I started it in hopes of collaborating with my good friends, Dayn and Lexi.  Who never post.  Oh, well..  so it's not a tank blog.  We all went to STO, and I thought... STO BLOG!!!  That didn't really happen either...  Chances diminished even further when we all pretty much pulled away from that game until they started making design decisions that made sense.


At least I still have my music...  Dream Evil put out a new album right about the time that I quit.  Go buy it.  Be a sheep.  Obey me! :3





Immortal

By Dream Evil

It's time to surrender, you know we feel no fear
Inferior contender, your men will not survive
You better tell your mortals to step aside
Or be the last man standing to watch them die

Immortal, forever we stand in line

Battlefield burning, arrows shadow the sky
I feel the yearning, longing to see their skin fry
Too late to beg for mercy, to step aside
This is your termination, just say goodbye

Immortal, forever, we just can't die

I am immortal, I cannot die, you better run and hide
We are immortal, we rule the slaughter, and side by side we ride

Immortal, forever, we stand in line
Immortal, forever, we just can't die
Immortal, forever, we stand in line

I am immortal, I cannot die, you better run and hide
We are immortal, we rule the slaughter, and side by side we ride
We are immortal, we show no fear, you better step aside
We are immortal, we rule the slaughter, and side by side we ride
We are immortal, we show no fear, you better step aside
I am immortal, I rule the slaughter, and side by side we ride

So many choices... so little... good choices...

I know I already bitched about the gear situation in Icecrown, so I'll keep it brief. Basically, because losing my 4 piece is a big deal (until I get another armor token), I'm looking at one of the cloaks. The ap cloak has all the right stats, but the strength cloak is actually really nice... only if I need the expertise. The real problem is I can't see far enough into the future to tell whether or not I could use it, or not. Upgrading my boots or belt would make the cape attractive instantly, but there are other things to consider.

Which brings me to my next bit: The upcoming Ashen Verdict Strength Ring. They've talked about implementing it, but they haven't shown us what kind of stats it'll have. Crit and ArP rating would be ideal, but what if it has haste and (fuckin' a) expertise on it? I'd be fucked. Actually, if the damn thing has haste on it, I can safely say that most players will stick with the ap ring. And that'll just set me off.

I mean, why make a ring just for warriors/paladins/death knights, and not give us the stats we need? You'll see me all over the forums if it happens. I'll be the idiot getting banned from the forums for calling the development team fucktards.

Musings During Maintenance

It's been a pretty slow week. Festergut looks like he isn't budging for our little casual guild, so I've been concentrating on leveling an alt. Mage is my class of choice, and I've gotta say that questing and grinding is full of suck. At least, leveling a fire mage is full of suck: All the mages I know are sure to let me know exactly how retarded I am for not leveling frost. What can I say, I really like lighting things on fire.

Any class can look awesome on a harpoon-surfboard!

The thing I hated more than the fjord is having to arrange every pull so that I don't get gang stabbed and die. It feels like I'm in the Barrio. If I piss off the wrong local, fourteen mother fuckers come running, and I die horribly. It wasn't like that on my paladin/warrior. Just faceroll the aoe abilities and they're all dead before they have a chance to eat your face.

This isn't to say that all of my leveling experience has been bad. I'm actually really enjoying the lfg system (20 minute waits aside), in that I can actually do at level content, instead of just waiting to hit it up on heroic mode, which is sort of what happened with all of my other characters. I can just queue up as DPS, knock out a quest or 20, and temporarily pause my questing trend to do a random dungeon if it ever actually happens.

Although, even at my level, there are plenty of people who really should've stayed home. Just last night, a hunter and druid pair were picking on the lucky bastard that had queued up as a tank for not having full +def gear at level 77. It's level fucking 77! My gear looks like shit too. Be glad the LFG gods gave us a tank, and try not to scare him off by being an insufferable fuckwad.

I really hate myself sometimes.

DPS Tracks 17: War is the Answer

I've got a few things on my mind, today. First, is Saurfang. Well, it's not that I hate Saurfang (although, he isn't on my fucking Christmas list or anything). But I kinda hate that our guild has a tendency of... slipping back down the difficulty slope. We get a kill, we make it look clean, and then the next week it's /smack! back to progression style wiping.

I know we only killed the big stupid orc once, but I suppose I have a case of wishful thinking, and hoped that we could, y'know... get through him before he got to 10 FUCKING MARKS!

Obligatory rant about Guild/Raid night aside, I found out that FFDP put out a second album. Sure, it came out in September, but sue me, I've been busy. I don't know if I talked about how much I like Five Finger Death Punch...

I like it this much!

Before I get to that, I've been noticing a large amount of (additional) QQ in the blogosphere about dps in Heroics. And while I already threw in my two cents on the matter (I really don't give a shit), I thought I'd share an encounter that tickled me pink.

I actually was not a member of this pug, but experienced it vicariously through guild members. I suppose some of you remember huntards. There aren't nearly as many as there used to be, since most of them rerolled Deathtards, so it is really a sight to see when you catch a glimpse of them in the wild. And this one was no different.

Clad in spellpower gear (possibly even a few cloth pieces), this Hunter came in at a low 500 dps, and the entire guild was giggling at his gear and his performance. We didn't bother to tell him in party chat, mind you, that he was possibly the worst player we'd seen since Braylon Edwards. We just thought it was funny to see someone two entire expansions behind in class knowledge and damage output.

Which is what brought me to my next thought. The next time I am actually watching the meters in a pug heroic, and someone struggles to break 1k dps, I'm going to stop and calmly tell them:

Burning Crusade called: They want their DPS back.



War is the Answer
By Five Finger Death Punch

[Verse 1]
(GO!)
This aint a test, fuck the rest.
Time to set the record straight.
Talk your shit behind my back, let's hear you say it to my face?
I've heard the words roll out your lips.
You little trendy fuckin' bitch!
The time has come to get you some, cause I just do not give a shit.

[Chorus]
Do you take me for a fool!?
How's it feel to be a tool!?
See to me you're just a cancer!
Motherfucker!, War is the Answer!

[Verse 2]
As of now the end begins,I want to laugh but there's no joke.
To eat with the beast, and run with the wolves.
On the Ashes you must choke.
I know it's got to chap your ass, to think I just won't go away.
Forget me not, I'm writing you off.
I've got nothing more to say.

[Chorus]
Do you take me for a fool!?
How's it feel to be a tool!?
To me you're just a cancer!
Motherfucker!, War is the Answer!

[Bridge]
(Get some!)
You wanna disrespect me, you little fuckin' punk?
Everything I've done?, And who I am? As far as I've fuckin' come?
I'll slap you so fuckin' hard, It'll feel like you kissed a freight train.
Fuck you!

[Guitar Solo]

(Rawr!)

[Chorus]
(Bam!)
Do you take me for a fool!?
How's it feel to be a tool!?
Talking shit behind my back...
See to me you're just a cancer!
The time has come to get you some.
Motherfucker!, War is the Answer!

Yeah!!!!!!!!!!

One mob at a time please...

If anyone knows me even a little bit, they would tell you I'm an incredibly laid back guy. And if you know me even better, you'd know that it takes quite a bit to get me pissed off. But when people say and do things that are so far away from intelligent that it makes you wince, I tend to get pretty annoyed. Especially when said offender repeats these offenses several times. Now when I'm puging the new heroics I know what kind of gamble I'm taking. But there is a limit that even the patient dwarf has.

Since I don't like waiting around in a queue for fifteen minutes, I tend to tank most heroics. So it's common practice of mine to inspect my healers gear to know how fast I can pull mobs. I knew it was going to be a painfully slow Forge of Souls when saw some gear so bad he'd have a hard time healing ten man Naxx. Since I'm a nice guy I didn't want to vote kick him, but my mouse was hovering over the option for a moment. Little did I know, the healer wasn't the problem.

So things get started, I pulled the first two mobs and the amazing happens. The mage in our group dies. I laugh it off to the fact that he probably killed himself to the spell reflects. Healer tosses a rez and we get moving. Next pull, I laugh a little bit more when our little mage friend dies again, almost instantly this time. I was a little confused why he died so fast that time, that is until I checked the combat logs. The little fucker started casting before I had pulled the mobs. And what does he say while lying on his back counting the tiles? "WTF? Again?" I delicately pointed out that if he felt like pulling the mobs it was bound to happen. He denied the fact that he pulled the mobs, but it's hard to ague against combat logs. I had thought the worst was behind us, but the fun was only getting started.

What my little mage buddy said next was perhaps the dumbest thing I've heard uttered in game. "Hey tank, stop pulling so many mobs!" Slightly confused I responded, "Uhh, what?" Certainly he didn't think I was pulling too many mobs? I was pulling them one group at a time, like any tank would if his healer wasn't that geared. "Pull them one mob at a time please!" Now here is where I started to get pissed. "And how do you propose I do that assclown? I pull one mob and the whole group comes with." The other members of the group backed me up and we slowly continued through the dungeon. "ONE MOB AT A TIME PLEASE!" Did he really just say that? Did he not see four people just tell him it is physically impossible to pull only one mob when my dps seem to lack the mental capacity to understand how cc works. "Listen jackass, I already told you, we can't pull ONE MOB AT A TIME. So just shut the fuck up and stop dying." Luckily he got the hint and shut up, he even managed to stay alive for one pull, but only one.

Just when I think his stupidity can't get any worse he proves me wrong, again. We've made it to the first boss. Not a hard fight at all. Before pulling the boss I do a quick glance over the party and notice my healer's mana is under 50%. The dps wasn't stellar so I gave him a chance to fill his mana pool back up. Oh but what's this? Our mage thought that since he was ready it was totally cool to pull the boss. This was right after face pulling a group of mobs, and succeeding in wiping the group. So I did what every smart tank would do in that situation. Let the boss kill the dumb ass then taunt him. He pissed and moaned the rest of the fight while taking a dirt nap.

The rest of the run was pretty much the same too. He'd face pull and die, or attack a mob before I charged in and die. I think my only bit of revenge the group got as a whole was during the Devourer of Souls fight. No one stopped damage when he cast Mirrored Soul on him. And the healer stopped wasting mana on him after the first boss. I'm pretty sure the only reason I didn't vote kick the bastard was I got too much enjoyment out of watching a gnome mage die over and over. So please, anyone reading this, if you're a douche bag don't expect the tank or the healer to save your life. No one cares if a douche bag dies.

Retribution Paladins...

I found a new blog that I really enjoy, although it is about the life and times of a couple of ret pallies. I'm gonna send Martana that way so they can go all Discovery Channel on each other's asses. I suppose I can't be too snarky. I imagine they don't like us nearly as much as we don't like them. That, and one of our best players is a ret pally.

Oh, shit, I said it. Yeah, I can respect my guildies when I'm not in the middle of a rant. But apparently, I rip on our resident retnoob a little too much. Why? Because I want him to get better.

That's why I started this blog (That and to bitch about Christian Fundamentalists). I've been improving since I started raiding, and I don't ever want to stop. It's been said that I take raiding a little too seriously, and that might be true for the casual raiding guild I chose to stay with. But I don't think that our "casual" tag should be an excuse to be unsuccessful. And I firmly believe that, with our 6-9 hour/week schedule, we are capable of quite more still.

And that's why I piss and moan when people backpedal out of doing simple things like bringing their own strength food, or flasking for every boss fight, or not installing Pally Power.

Little things, and... fuck it, I'm spent.  Watch a movie or something and leave me alone.

Xi's Guide to Raiding

When coming up with a "commandment-style" list of things that every raider should adhere to, I noticed the first two applied to everything else. Really, it all boils down to two very brief principles.

A. Don't be a douchebag
B. Use some common sense

The first of which is actually pretty easy. It's in the bible, even. Now, I don't know the book word for word, but I'm pretty sure the lesson could be paraphrased into "Thou shalt not be a large sack of douche."

The second is a little bit more complicated. What members of the generation before me have considered to be "common sense" doesn't seem to be very common these days. I suppose a less "PC" way of saying it is: Don't be a complete idiot.

Obviously, given that the above statements are at the very core of this post, a monkey with a grease pencil could construct a guide to raiding. Well fuck that monkey. I got here first.

#1: Don't stand in the fire

This applies to fire patches, poisonous or otherwise "ominous" clouds, lightning lines, etc. Don't stand in the dangerous shit.

Seriously.

If it hurts you, the raid, or even just turns on some dude's porch light in China, don't fucking touch it unless your raid leader tells you to.

#2: Never blame the healer

I don't even care if it's their fault. In a guild setting, you have the opportunity to correct any healer issues through other channels, through suggestions from the main healer and other members of the healing ensemble, or through assigned readings from the wealth of articles online.

#3: Bring your goddamn raid mats 

Seriously. Get some flasks. Your own goddamn food (spellcasters only are excluded if a fish feast is present).  Shut up, sit down and eat.  Every minute, of every hour, of every raid.  Use them.  You know what happens if you do more dps during trash?  You get done faster.  Which means you get more attempts on the boss.  Just do it.

And if I hear one more ret paladin tell me that the fish feast is "just as good" as a piece of strength food, I will explode and take out an entire time zone in the process.

I don't even play your class and I know strength food is better.   /backhand

#4: L2P

I'm sure I'll get shit for this one. See that shit in the side bar? That's for Fury warriors. And there are about a billion other people, just like me, with websites and blogs dedicated to discussing the mechanics which are specific to your role and class. Go there. Learn from them. And stop doing 3k dps in full 245 gear.

#5: Obey your raid leader

Raid leading is a pretty stressful job. I know, I used to do it on the weekends. Nothing like trying to lead a bunch of casuals (some of which don't like to show up on time/at all) to lower your life expectancy. The last thing they need is some ungrateful little pissant to start spewing their filth about how much we need to do better. If we're wiping, i.e. not killing a boss, then yes, we need to do better. Thanks for the tip, asshole.

Do what your raid leader tells you, and shut the fuck up. I don't care if he tells you to go across your street IRL and slap someone's mom in the face. Either do it or leave, because you are fucking up the program by sitting around and arguing. They're leading the raid for a reason. Respect them or get replaced.

And yes, my raid leader did tell me to slap some kid's mom. I've never felt so satisfied.

#6: Wipe and recover quickly

A wise man once told me that the key to progression raiding was quick wipe recovery. Fast recovery means more attempts on a boss, and more attempts etc. etc. If -one- assbag decides to go check his livejournal between attempts, it effectively slows down the whole thing. It only takes one per attempt to make a night of 15 attempts end up being more like 5.

Stop screwing around and stay at your keyboard. Emergencies happen, but if your bladder is that weak, get a goddamned bucket.

I actually started writing this damned thing months ago, and at the time, I thought I had lots more to pour into it.  I am so full of anger and ramen that I thought I could keep it going forever.  But a lot of pieces of advice not on the list are somewhat useless. I could talk about loot, and how to behave during distribution, but if you're talking about loot, you already beat the boss, so there really isn't a problem with the raid.

I'll likely add to this over time, or maybe Gincan will come along and drop in his two cents.  But I'll have to edit it.  I don't think he uses enough four letter words.

Itemization Woes

I swear, it's as if the Blizzard Developers took a vacation during Trial of the Crusader. Because when they came back, they completely forgot how to itemize plate. Hit and haste? Paladin, please. The entire zone is littered with an overabundance of items with these stats. Don't believe me? Let's look at the 2 hander situation in Icecrown.

What two handers, you ask? There's a mace with an obscene amount of hit rating on it, and that stupid Bryntroll that all those paladins are shitting the bed about. Yes, it's high (compared to TOC counterparts) top end damage and decent proc make it more than suitable as a main hand weapon. However, it's fast speed and relatively small top end (when compared with Shadow's Edge and the Cryptmaker), not to mention it's lack of stats make it absolutely horrible for an off hand. Which means, once you upgrade it (and you will), you might as well go back to a Justicebringer in your off hand. It's stats are just that much better than that proc'ing piece of crap.

I'm a little pissed off at the set bonus situation, too. The ilvl 251 gear just doesn't size up to ilvl 245 ToC gear, when the set bonuses are taken into account. I'm talking about -all- the set bonuses. I exchanged every last piece on Landsoul's spreadsheet, regemmed, and the difference is marginal. It certainly isn't worth the 300+ badges you need to gear yourself out. I think it's Blizzard's way of saying 1) Fuck you, and 2) Go get 25 man tokens, and 3) Fuck you warriors, suck your shitty tier bonuses.

/rant

DPS Tracks 16: Won't Back Down

That'll Do Pig, That'll Do...

Ever since the Random Dungeon finder tool was introduced, I've done more tanking than ever before. But I find tanking gets increasingly boring. It's also a bit of a thankless job too. Now I don't run these dungeons looking for praise or respect, but it's nice to hear a good job, or even a thanks when a dps is acting retarded and I save their life. Not once has a dps said one thing to me for keeping them alive. I've had a healer or two thank me for the easy run, but that's about it. This is why I often find myself sucking it up, unchecking the Tank box and waiting 10 - 20 minutes for a spot as dps.

Here is where being a good tank and a good dps differs. About every other run someone will speak up and say something to the effect of "Jebus, sick DPS Gin!". As a matter of fact, that is a direct quote from the Warlock in my Forge of Souls run last night. It's something everyone likes to hear. Even if it comes from the mouth of a Gnome Warlock. It validates the fact that all your hard work is something praiseworthy. I put a lot of effort into learning the ins and outs of my class, and getting a tiny bit of praise makes me want to work even harder. And more importantly, it keeps the game fun for me.

The same is true for every job, in and out of game. You can be the best at what you do, but if no one goes out of their way to give you a small bit of praise it all feels worthless. It's simple thing to do but it's something the majority of us fail at. Maybe it's the fact that we've been conditioned to only point out the negative and not the positive in people. Perhaps it's our own insecurities that keep us from speaking up. Or maybe most of us don't run recount. Whatever it may be, I've made it a habit to say good job to anyone who has done an outstanding job. It's not often that I tank for a dps that really knows what he is doing, but when I do I say something.